So Awkward: Awkward Convention

So Awkward Episode 2

The Return of Blofeld?

The half-century long legal dispute between MGM and the estate of Kevin McClory has finally come to an end, with MGM being granted the rights to Ernst Stavro Blofeld, S.P.E.C.T.R.E., and all the other plot and character elements from Thunderball. Read more about this case here, or watch my Never Say Never Video where I talk about it here. Either way, it's over, and the winner is... nobody? I dunno.

Most news outlets and bloggers are saying this finally allows MGM to use Blofeld in their current Bond films, and while that's true, I doubt it's going to happen. I'm no legal expert (and my expertise on the Bond series is totally self-proclaimed), but I would imagine that MGM finally settled this matter not because they intend to ever use Blofeld or S.P.E.C.T.R.E. again, but because they want to ensure nobody else ever will. After all, Kevin McClory did manage to produce his own Bond film in 1983, and the possibility has lingered since then that his estate might someday try again. Whoever is in charge of McClory's estate must be very smart and realized that was a lost cause, so they probably got a lot of money from MGM. Good for them.

The Daniel Craig series is so drastically different in tone from the Connery films that spawned characters like Blofeld, so it's hard to imagine they'll find a way to work him in. However, lives have been lost counting out a man like Ernst Stavro Blofeld and believing him to be dead, so I will remain cautiously on the sidelines. After all, never say never again and all that.

But if MGM does bring back Blofeld, I have the perfect actor to cast in the role: Julian Glover.

Comic-A-Thon

So Awkward Episode 1: Awkward Monday

Internet... you just got awkwarded:

World War Z

They should've called this movie "World War Zzzzzzz...."

To be fair, it's not a bad film. In fact, it's maybe even a pretty good film, and you'll probably enjoy it if you like action and horror films but have somehow never seen any other zombie movies already. But having said that, if you've never seen any zombie movies, don't start with this once, since there are literally a dozen or so others I'd recommend first. This is a perfectly fine zombie film, it just added nothing much to the genre other than more CG and more zombies. This would've been an awesome film had it come out a decade or go, but unfortunately it came out a few months ago.

And that's pretty much all I have to say about World War Z, since I can't really review it since I only watched the first 45 minutes or so. That was the point when I realized I wasn't even paying attention, so I turned it off and watched something else.

The Heat

If this wasn't the worst movie I've ever seen, it's certainly the worst movie I've seen in a long, long time.

I think Sandra Bullock is a gifted comic actress, and she managed to make her scenes at least barely watchable, but I had never seen this Melissa McCarthy person before, and can say without hesitation that she's the worst. Was she supposed to be funny? Because she wasn't. It's been a long time since I've seen a performer so completely devoid of charisma, charm, and talent. Of course, I probably wasn't seeing her at her best, since this film had no script and seemingly no director.

All I really can say about this film is that it wasn't the least bit funny, and if the genders had been switched and this was a buddy cop about two men who treated women the way these two treated men, nobody involved in this film would ever be allowed to work again. I've certainly never seen, say, Ryan Reynolds shooting a woman in the vagina as the punchline to a joke.

Skip it.