Video Clip of the Week: Big Mamma 3

Who knew they were making another Big Momma's House movie? I probably won't go see it, but I like Martin enough to give him a free plug on my website. Anyway, I'll admit... I laughed.

Despicable Me

I don't have a whole lot to say about this movie, but I figured I'd mention it if only because I've been so negative with my past few reviews. But, anyway, this movie was hilarious. I recommend it highly for adults as well as adults with children. It was incredibly funny, moving, and just plain clever.

Check it out. Two thumbs way up.

The Social Network

I watched about ten minutes of this before shutting it off. It opened with a conversation between two obnoxious, insufferable people, at least one of whom was the star so I assumed he was going to be in it until the ending. I didn't want to spend another minute with these characters, so I shut the movie.

I'm sure it's well written because the dialogue was intelligent and well constructed. I'm sure it's well acted because star Jessie Eisenberg is usually quite likable and charming, so I'm assuming the fact that he was so boring and obnoxious was an intentional acting decision. And I'm sure it's well directed because David Fincher is a famous, well respected guy.

But I turned it off after ten minutes because I found it to be unwatchable.

Super Bowl Movie Trailers

I didn't watch the Super Bowl this year, just like I didn't watch it last year, the year before that, or the year before that. I don't even watch it for the commercials, which is an activity I've never really understood because the commercials aren't all that different, better, or more exciting. After the game, they usually go into regular rotation anyway, so it's not like that's the only way to see them even if they are outstanding.

However, the movie trailers are usually worth checking out, if only because they often are the first time you really get a good look at some of the more exciting movies coming out later this year or the next.

Let's take a look at some of the more interesting film trailers that aired during last Sunday's big game:

Captain America: The First Avenger



This looks pretty cool. I'm excited for it. Captain America is one of the three or four best comic book heroes ever, and this looks like it'll be a pretty cool movie. I like Chris Evans, and director Joe Johnson certainly did an amazing job with the Rocketeer. However, that costume really looks lame now that I see it in motion.

But... I'll see it, probably on opening weekend. It looks cool.

Happy Birthday, John Williams

Blessed Are the Geeks wants to wish a happy and healthy birthday to our all time favorite film composer, John Williams. Favorite film composer? Hell, he's our favorite composer ever! I thought about doing a top ten list of my favorite compositions, but he has done too many, and it is all too amazing to rank in any real, meaningful way. It's all brilliant.

Machete

This movie was ok.

There isn't much to say about a feature length film that was based on a fake movie trailer. As far as these things go, it was as well done an adaptation as could be expected, but that isn't to say it was all that great. It certainly had a lot of pretty girls taking their clothes off, and maybe more decapitations than any other film I'm ever seen. After about the fifteen decapitation, however, it started to get boring. This was the kind of movie that would've been a rip-roaring good time had it been only an hour and fifteen minutes or so, but since it was actually about an hour and fifty, it just over stayed its welcome and felt like a chore.

But it's definitely entertaining, for the most part, what with all the pretty girls and the heads flying off. Director Robert Rodriguez certainly knows how to stage a fun action sequence, and he always assembles fun casts that give fun performances. It's difficult to say how much Robert Rodriguez did on this movie, however, since he is only credited as co-director, along with some guy named Ethan Maniquis. I'm guessing that their collaboration consisted of Rodriguez calling the set and saying something along the lines of, "Today you should film a fight scene where Machete chops off a bunch of guys' heads and shit," and then Maniquis would go and film that. All things considered, it was a perfectly adequately directed movie, but maybe it would've been more fun and excited had Rodriguez actually directed it himself.

The star of the film is long-time Rodriguez player Danny Trejo. Trejo is always dependable and fun to watch as a heavy, but he really proved in this movie that he's incapable of carrying a film all by himself. Jessica Alba is a fine actress in her own right, but even her stunning good looks (and, frankly, there's nobody sexier in the world than her) didn't do much to elevate Trejo's one-note performance. I like Trejo and think he's awesome as a supporting actor in a movie like Predators, but he just lacks any kind of real charisma and gravitas needed to carry an entire movie. The supporting actors were all really great too -- including notable names like Linday Lohan, Don Johnson, Jeff Fahey, and Robert DeNerio(!!!) -- but none of them were really given much to do. The best of the lot was actually Steven Segal, who was really fun as the main villain.

So... this movie was ok. Check it out for the shot of Jessica Alba naked in the shower (you don't see anything, but even her side is better than a full frontal shot of any other woman), and maybe for all the heads flying off, but you might get bored after the first 45 minutes or so. I sure did.

Video Clip of the Week: Leftover Beatles Memories

Another clip from The Dana Carvey Show. For my money, there's nothing funnier than Dana Carvey doing Paul McCartney.

Oliver Stone Career Retrospective

Oliver Stone used to be one of my favorite filmmakers, but I lost interest in his films after he stopped making movies that looked appealing. Watching Wall Street 2 the other day didn't really change my opinion of his recent run of films (since it totally sucked), but it did rekindle my interest and appreciation for the man's films. Or, anyway, it made me want to look back on them all and share my opinions.

So, here is my (directorial) Career Retrospective on... Oliver Stone:

Seizure (1974)
Never seen it, never heard of it. Apparently it's about a writer who is terrorized by characters from his novels. It stars Jonathan Frid, who people may know better as the star of that TV series Dark Shadows. Um... or maybe not. Anyway, it sounds cool. I'll check it out and get back to you later.

The Hand (1981)
This one I've actually seen, and it wasn't that good. It's about a guy who loses his hand in a car accident (or something), and then it comes alive and starts to terrorize him. It stars Michael Caine, which sounds impressive, but back in the mid 80s Caine was making a lot of shit. This was way before Cider House Rules put him back on top as a notable movie star. Still, Caine is always dependable and Stone's talents as a director make this better than your average B horror movie.

Salvador (1986)
Stone followed up that piece of shit horror movie with an absolute masterpiece. Salvador is seriously one of the best movies from the 80s, and the first great movie made by Oliver Stone. It's a historical fiction about a photojournalist who covers the atrocities happening in El Salvador during the mid 80s. It's harrowing, gripping stuff, featuring an amazing central performance by James Woods, who went on to be an Oliver Stone favorite.

This was only Stone's third film, but his screenplay earned him an Oscar nomination (he had already won an Oscar for writing the screenplay for the 1979 film Midnight Express). James Woods was also nominated for Best Actor, but he lost to Paul Newman for Color of Money. Paul Newman is one of the best actors of all time, but James Wood deserved the award that year. Anyway, great movie. Check it out.

Platoon (1986)
This was the film that made Oliver Stone a major player in Hollwood. Platoon was Stone's first movie about the Vietnam War, and it was so popular and influential, that it ushered in a renewed interest in the war, and helped to give most American's a better appreciation for the troops and what they endured over there. After this movie, everybody made movies about Vietnam, some of the more notable ones being Full Metal Jacket, Gardens of Stone, Hamburger Hill, and the TV series China Beach, among many, many others.

Platoon also garnered Stone his first Oscar as Best Director. His screenplay was also nominated, alongside his screenplay for Salvador, which may be some kind of unparalleled achievement for all I know. Has anybody else ever been nominated for best Director and Best Screenplay twice in the same year? Anyway, Platoon is an amazing movie that holds up as one of the best and most enthralling war movies ever made, helped in no small part because Stone himself was a veteran of the same war.

Happy Birthday, George A. Romero

Blessed Are the Geeks wants to wish a very happy and healthy birthday to George A. Romero, who is one of the greatest filmmakers of all time. He looks more an more like a zombie himself every day, which would be an insult to anybody else, but for him it somehow seems like the most fitting compliment.


Happy birthday, George!

Video Clip of the Week: Job Helmet

This is one of those scenes I could watch 1,000 times in a row and I'd never not laugh.

Iron & Wine: Kiss Each Other Clean

I don't fancy myself any kind of music reviewer, so I'll just keep this short and to the point. I bought the new Iron & Wine album this afternoon, and it's amazing. Go buy it.

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps

I bet money would fall asleep if it tried to watch this movie.

This was a strange, vexing, somewhat admirable failure of a film by a director who used to be one of my favorite filmmakers. Oliver Stone has always been a strange man who made polarizing films, but he never used to make boring ones, until the past few years, however, when he seemed to go soft and start making movies that could've been directed by anybody. I don't like movies directed by anyone. I like movies directed by Oliver Stone. Or, at least, I used to. Anyway, I certainly didn't like this one.

When I heard that Stone was going to make a sequel to his classic film Wall Street, set in the present day and centered around our recent economic collapse, I was excited. I rewatched the original film just to catch up on the story again (and was surprised by how brilliantly it holds up), but then I saw the trailer and it looked... meh. When the reviews and word of mouth was terrible, I still meant to see it, but I just never found the time or the energy. I finally rented it on Blu Ray, and just about the best thing I can say about it is that the video presentation was flawless. The movie, however, sucked.

First of all, it was boring. Of course, economics and accounting and stock trading aren't exactly the most thrilling things upon which to base a film, but the first Wall Street was brilliantly entertaining and enthralling. If you know a lot about economics or the recent market problems, you might find some stuff to enjoy here, but as an admitted moron, I was bored and left clueless. The first film was about the same things, but it was told in a way that morons like me could understand and follow along. After watching the first film, I came away with a better understanding of Wall Street. After watching the sequel, I walked away learning nothing at all, and suspected that Oliver Stone didn't know much either. The collapse of the markets happened just as abruptly in the movie as it did in real life, which may have been a stylistic approach to model reality, but it was just awkward and confusing when put on film.

Storywise, this film was just a huge mess. Shia LaBeouf is a talented actor, but his character was so poorly written and thought out that it was all but impossible to care about him or anything he did. I had no emotional attachment to his character, nor did I believe any of the relationships he formed with his girlfriend or any of his various mentors or friends. Did he want revenge on the villain? Did he want to save the world with clean hydro fusion (whatever the hell that is)? Or did he just want to make lots of money? I asked these questions because the film never answered them, and just when you thought the character's motivations and arc was clear, the filmed changed directions and ignored what came before in favor of some new tangent. It was just terrible.

I can't say anything bad about the cast, however, which was fantastic. It was a treat to see Michael Douglas reprising his role as Gordon Gekko. Every scene he was in was worth watching and a lot of fun. He's still a great actor who oozes charisma. Also great was Josh Brolin, who was in this film because he legally has to appear in every film now. There was also a really strange, awkward cameo by Charlie Sheen, who was the star of the original Wall Street film. It was fun to see this character pop back up, but it was so awkwardly acted by Sheen, and it made no sense why his character was such a jerk.

So... skip it. It was a well intentioned film that attempted to skewer the 21st world of Wall Street the way the original skewered the Wall Street of the 80s, but it just lacked bite and was poorly written.